As I began my journey of awakening to the gifts and sensitivities I had, I crossed many taboo thresholds and meandered into murky territory that frightened people close to me and bucked orthodox Christianity. I knew there was something more to our feelings and our imaginations than was being accepted in Sunday School or our science based prove-it-to-me mentality. Still there were good reasons to be wary of mediums. You don't want to mess with a powerful woman who possesses magical abilities. Trust me on this.
When I was ready to open deeper I found a mentor who taught me how to engage in this work with integrity and I wanted to pass along some of this wisdom for those navigating this mysterious terrain. Here are some rules of engagement that I use in my practice with clients:
1. Respect the sovereignty of every being
I learned about this concept when I was studying the Montessori Method for teaching to children. Humans are not blank slates. Each human has access to an inner teacher (the Holy Spirit/the Self/Higher Self) who guides the soul on their journey of discovery. Each soul has a unique path, so one size will not fit all. When we respect the inner world of children and of our clients, we are making room for their inner teacher to emerge. We are also stepping out of a power imbalance that happens with guru/devotee.
It's easy to get caught up in idolizing a guru, teacher, or higher being, but no matter what kinds of gifts someone has, each of us is called to awaken and to look within. Just as we can't continue to export our jobs, so we can't continue to export our religion or spirituality. The inner world of the human being is sacred space and we can't have access to someone's most private reality, nor should we. The soul has a right to a safe container for learning and growing and protecting fragile parts of self until they are ready to emerge in the world. No matter how wise or powerful another being, as humans we have every right to our sovereignty, freedom and choice.
I will not ever say to a client that I know something about them that they don't know about themselves. Instead I will offer my intuitive hits and ask my clients to consider if it resonates for them or not. As sovereign beings we all have free will and personal choice to decide what to believe for ourselves. I will encourage my clients to check with their guides/intuition if things feel right for them. We can always leave information outside of our space, in a bubble for future consideration. My goal is to catalyze and awaken your inner teacher so that you can eventually do this work without me.
2. Opening up only for your highest good and the highest good of all beings
Channeling was a no-no in my Christian circles growing up. Even meditation was frowned upon for if you simply opened your mind, Satan could surely sneak right in! I heard some Christians justify this rational to stay busy all the time and never practice relaxing and opening their mind to peace and the mere presence of mystery, the Holy Spirit or Being itself. Being open is a yin practice, a feminine state of being that rests and heals and receives guidance from Source. It's the listening aspect of prayer rather than the asking. As sovereign beings we can declare for ourselves what kinds of energy we are willing to open ourselves up to and what kinds we are not. We can make an intention when we relax or meditate that we are only opening up to receive that which is for our highest good and the highest good of all beings and that will cover us and connect us to our most potent sources of wisdom.
Everyone's practice of mediation is different. Some people move into the void, into no-thing, into silence. Others move into visuals, see beings, travel places, or hear voices or music. Some get inspiration for a work project or creative project or receive downloads of information on questions they ask.
Just by relaxing and calming the body, we are gaining access to the upstairs brain which opens us up to higher states of being. When we are moving too fast, scared, or triggered, or in survival mode, or have adrenal fatigue we are operating from the downstairs reptilian brain and the fight/flight/fear/freeze responses. This is not the ideal place to live life from--sure it's great when you need to run from a bear, but not everyday should feel like an emergency situation. However the pace of life in America does a good job to keep us running around as if we are always traumatized. The upstairs brain requires calm and peace. There we can easily find solutions to problems that when frazzled are just simply out of reach.
3. Honor the human/honor the shadow
Nobody here is perfect. Even the most glittery guru has their issues. Carl Jung said there was much danger in identifying one's ego with beings of light: it creates a really big shadow. Life must be balanced. I've met a few healers who believe that they are a powerful being from history and this is always a red flag for me, for I see that they are here born as a human with a different name in a different time and I wonder about that human and I care for the traumatized ones who reached so deeply for the light when the darkness seemed all consuming. We all may have access to these higher streams of consciousness (via the Akashic Records), but we are still humans walking this earth. We are still both animal and divine. We are saved by grace, and still sinners. What is denied in our consciousness grows stronger in the shadows until one day it erupts to restore balance to the game. All of us light workers would do well to keep our shadows in our sights. For when I can't see my shadow, I'm most likely to project in on someone else and cause a lot of pain. If a healer identifies with only the light and believes themselves to be a god--you can bet there is a devil very close by. And watch out: it might be you! Groups like this tend to demonize and fragment others, as happened throughout history in witch burnings and anathematizing; the opposite must be killed (scape-goated) with the community's shadow. A long time ago the shadow was the dance parter, the tension is meant to be held, not burned at the stake.
If someone can't admit that they are wrong, watch out. Look for mentors who are up front about their growth edge and personal struggles. People in love with power will not love others very well, and if you're looking for healing, you'll want to find people who can truly love you on this leg of your journey. Remember: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13: 4)
4. Remember to Play
Ultimately we're very small in the grand scheme of life. Pride can be a good thing when it's rooted in our divine essence and celebrating the goodness of life. But when people want to control the conversation, control how everything pans out, control one view of reality, watch out. When we've lost the ability to play and be spontaneous in the present moment, then we're running on trauma, not pneuma (spirit). We come to the table as different but created equal. May we co-create a joyful reality for the highest good of all beings.
5. Stop and smell the flowers
There are many gifted people in the world we can learn from. Don't put all your eggs in one basket and don't make one teacher your sole source of wisdom. Visit other flowers. There's so much beauty to experience!
I hope these rules of engagement help clear up confusion and boost your confidence to expand your consciousness in a safe and respectful way!
The light in me salutes the light in you. Have a beautiful week.