Words for a Wedding

 Congratulations Gina & Zach! 

Congratulations Gina & Zach! 

I performed my first wedding last weekend and had prepared many things to say during the service to the couple. All of us felt the nerves, the significance of this moment, the grand promises and high hopes for the future. As I stood in front of this beautiful couple and felt their tender energy, witnessed their love, and humor, I was so humbled and moved. I was not expecting to see such a distant country in their eyes. When I began to speak to them I saw within each of their gazes a bright light, a heavenly sun. I saw our destination, our ultimate home--this heaven where love lives. I was so humbled by the light flowing through their eyes that I wanted to weep. But I had to speak. So I suppressed my tears until they were flowing down my nose instead. I quickly forgot all the things I wanted to say, as we shared these most precious moments together. So here it is, post ceremoniously, some reflections on the beauty of marriage in a time when monogamy and devotion seem to be disposable.

Marriage is the ongoing work of a mystery of the two becoming One. Just as a drop of water in a glass of wine cannot be removed, so it is that once the two become one, it is impossible for them to become two again. For they have co-mingled in the mystery and alchemy of love. Hieros Gamos or sacred union is one of the most lofty goals and highest achievements that can be made by humanity: that joining together of the divine man and the divine woman within human flesh. It is the work and alchemy of love itself, the transmutation of lead to gold, the restoration of the dignity of humanity, the honoring of the sacred masculine and the sacred feminine, connecting humanity back to its true divine nature and source. True marriage is not a ball and chain: it is freedom to become more of who you really are, a promise to remember the divine light in our beloved. Like many beautiful ancient spiritual teachings given to humanity, the rites of marriage were distorted and used as a system of ownership and slavery and violence. We do not agree to participate in the distortions any longer, but to reinstate the glory and pinicle work of love that is possible for humans at this time that we all may experience the god and goddess remembering one another. 



I was studying about consciousness recently and learned that the polarities of divine mind are necessary to hold the expansive field of consciousness. This means that paradox and opposites and tensions are necessary for life to flow. Marriage is not supposed to be about the loss of self. It is the call to know thyself. To know our light, our divine nature, our dignity, and our gifts, our unique stance in the hologram of creation. It is also a call to know our shadows, our growth edge, our lands of unconsciousness. Our mates help us see more clearly. Tensions are not to be avoided. They are necessary catalysts for our growth. They call us to express ourselves more clearly. To grow beyond any illusions. For the true nature of reality—the sages and ascended masters have told us throughout the ages—is that love is the ultimate reality, all else is illusion.

"Through my love for you, I want to express my love for the whole cosmos, the whole of humanity, and all beings. By living with you, I want to learn to love everyone and all species. If I succeed in loving you, I will be able to love everyone and all species on Earth. This is the real message of love." -Tich Nhat Hanh

Marriage is a call to work on shedding the illusions together, until nothing is left but the purity of two light beings and their unified field of love. For all that is created in love is eternal. The mystery of the two becoming one is also the mystery of the two becoming three. Your relationship is the field of consciousness where a brand new energy is born. Carrying the unique aspects of woman, and the unique aspects of man, you are both weaving together a new reality of love on earth. You are anchoring one of the most indestructible creative forces onto the earth through your devotion and care for your union.

So tend the field of your relationship, just as you would tend a garden. Be mindful of your words and the energies you exchange with one another each day. When you make a mistake, be humble and courageous to make it right and to continue to learn your divinity in humility. For all of our mistakes are simply learning opportunities, opportunities to shed illusions, opportunities to remember divine truth. Learn until there is nothing left but love within each of you and all around you.

Many blessings on this union and every union on earth this day. May your marriage and every marriage be free of the illusory chains of slavery and illusionary models of co-depentent self-sacrifice. May your marriage be uplifted back to its beautiful expression of divine man and divine woman. May your marriage and every marriage be filled with many years of joy and happiness for the greatest good of all beings.

Medusa Medicine

 
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Present mood: Chance of turning people to stone with one wrong look. Wear shades. Hide in your cave.

I must honor this time. It's so powerful. Women weren't sent away from villages because they were dirty or sinful. It was always because they were powerful and psychic. They overwhelmed the men and children. Women created these sacred gatherings to strengthen their wisdom, share their power, and transform their communites.

I have much still to heal. I can see it on days like these. We are looking at yurts for the backyard, a place I can retreat in solitude for a few days each month. This is the self care I need. It's the self care many women need.

I'm having flash backs to a dark time in 8th grade. Having flash backs through ancient history and feeling the Goddess’ rage at Gilgamesh for cutting down the tree of life. Time traveling. Having flash forwards at the dangers of AI and the disrespect and domination of the earth. Aligning my third eye at the true enemy.

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Rage about the disrespect of life, water, animals, children in a for profit system meant to turn organic matter into garbage. Missing the ancient festivals, leisure and play on earth for humans to learn and grow in joy. Feeling my snake hair. Finding my battle ax. Feeling the demonization and great fall of the Goddess.  Feeling Her disintegrated body beginning its resurrection phase. Holding the shadows of so many lost frightened souls, and still holding my Sovereignty. Mothering many demons back to angels. Aware of my powers to turn men to stone and break hearts. Aware of my mission to cease the wheels of samsara. For every stoney heart, for every knife in the chest, a healed and open heart chakra. First I have to get mine more open. An alchemy of the pain to joy, lead to gold. May it be so. May these wounds shift into their diamond form.

My own sealed tight heart that says: never again will I be hurt like that. Trying to pry it open. That's not the way in. Gentle she says. More gentle. Too gentle. The hard shell must be here. No one gets in this deep. Not safe. Facing impossible fears of marriage ever working out again. Raging on Dumuzi and Zeus for forgetting me when I was in the underworld. For the ages of betrayals, affairs, and neglect. Working on forgiveness. And taking logs out of my eyes so I can see my partner in present time and not the echos of the past. Will my beloved be able to hold all this fire? Will he be able to help me heal? Will I be able to help him? The dream. Healers, heal thyselves. We are trying.

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Still, so much raging on the wandering, floundering, unaccountable immature reckless golden boy-child who still seeks comfort in distraction and dismemberment.  Wondering if he’ll ever grow up to meet the Goddess eye to eye as an honorable divine man. Until then, he cuts me down and gets so damn condescending in his work to sever the chords with his unconscious controlling (wounded) mother (goddess). Yes I'm looking at you Dumuzi. Gilgamesh. Zeus. Posiden. Damn I love your passion. But know the nuances of your force. You're wildly dangerous. And someday you will stear the sun. But first lets learn how not to wipe out anymore planets, OK?

I'm integrating your upgraded form. Retrograde Mars is learning so much. There is so much passion. I'm still not sure I can trust it. I'm afraid of falling farther down. I know it's my sisters who hold the form of the hologram.  It is we who hold ourselves and you. It's time for rising now.

I will not condescend in return. Maybe. I try. Working on compassion and honoring free will of all beings.

Sometimes we allow our bodies to be raped. Sometimes we allow our heads to be cut off. Sometimes we hold the mirror to the monster that is projecting its unconscious pain upon us.

I'm pleading with the Goddess for deep deep healing. Asking Her to hold my partner when I must push him out of the nest to fly on his own, when I must find my center all by myself--he doesn't know the way to my center. No one does. No one but me. Only the High Priestess enters the Holy of Holies. And only with the True King. Who is still remembering. Still learning. Still being tested by the Goddess.

I need no male savior. I push so he doesn't get burned in my wild fire. It's what he loves about me. It's what I love about him.

I know he is strong enough. I've seen it. I know I am strong enough. I feel it. 

A sacred woman doesn’t always smile meek like Mother Mary. Sometimes she carries the sacrificial knife under her robes and must decide what to destroy today. Best to leave her alone lest she decides it's you.

Though you could risk it, show up with roses and red wine and you may just have the time of your life. (Thanks, G <3).   

I'm about to paint my livingwomb red and have another glass of wine.  

Fires of transformation. 

Let them burn.

 

Intermediate Yoga Practice

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Join me for a yoga practice from my backyard sanctary. This practice is not for beginners. Please consult your primary care physician to see if this or any other fitness routine is right for you. Practice at your own risk. Listen to your body and move with your breath in gentle motions, moving towards your growth edge, and moving back to your core. 

This practice includes space clearing, energy work, and channeled music. If you are using and sharing this practice, consider returing an energetic exchange and supporting Taraloma Earth Temple, Jessica and her family by donating to the Temple Treasury. Thank you <3 Namaste

May 15, New Moon Oracle

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On this significant day where the energies of Uranus have moved into Taurus for a season of reckoning, liberation and great healing, I would like to offer this oracle.

An image from a dream that a woman had: this is the god's last stand--the one who's temple is made of armor. I looked and behold there was a god like Thor, the god of war, and his head was replaced by a phallus--a literal dick head. The men who worshiped here were making super soldiers on Mars, turning men into machines, into monsters, into programmable robots. 

Come I said to my sisters, let us restore the gods crown. Let us put back his sacred phallus where it belongs, let us speak to his heart, and they agreed. And we said: We have mended Medusa's head. We have faced and are facing our demons as we went mad apart from our sacred grandmother's traditions, in broken relationships with our mothers, sisters and children, as the sacred women's traditions were stolen from us as our bodies like counties were invaded and raped as our realms of wisdom were eclipsed  from our eyes. But our bodies remember and our hearts are opening again after an age of trauma to say: we forgive you.  Those who hung us, burned us, those who in their fear of us, their fear of survival, those in their own wounding who stole, abused and murdered our children, those who fragmented the sacred web of women, we forgive those who knowingly or unknowingly caused us harm. We also ask for forgiveness for those grievances that we have caused knowingly or unknowingly when in our trauma we wounded your heart.

We remember the great Kings of old and those who pledge to protect the earth, women and children and to defend the sacred. Men of War, Aphrodite is calling to Ares, remember your pledge to fight only for love, to defend the weak, to protect the powerless, to stand in your true dignity again, and to receive the crown of heaven's highest honor of man when you open your armored heart that you may be healed.

We remember the mad gods, we remember the divine men who suffered an age of Set, the dividing one, those men who gave up their crowns of glory to descend into human madness not to condem it, but to have compassion on it that it may be redeemed and healed once and for all.

We remember today those heros who have lost their heads: John the baptist, Ganesh, Saul Absolom, and the hosts of men who have died throughout the ages in honor defending love. To all the headless horsemen who rode with women to the very edges of their madness to the very end of the age, who for love gave everything, even their sanity, and their very bodies: come home my sons your work is done!

May this day you trade your hearts of stone for a heart of love. May you trade the armored temple for the living sanctuary that you are. May the crowns of madmen and medusas be restored to their former glory that all may see and know the power and the glory of the one most high. This day and for all of eternity. May it be so. Amen. Amen. Amen. 

+Jessica Zdenek
High Priestess & Yogini Oracle of the Prairie

Spring Equinox Supplication

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Oh mother divine

Oh void

Oh womb of creation

Goddesses of the Infinite Circle

Take me back to you

A daughter of men

Lost from you

Made to fear your power

Made to fear my power

Medusa medicine

Powers to heal

Powers to destroy

Powers to create new realities

Shake off the nightmares

Of headless women

The ages of trauma

Rattle oh snakes in my head

Speak oh searing tongues

Zeus, I want my lightning back, and my powerful gaze

Athena, my blood please

Circles of sisters

Divine Magdalenes

Order of the Marys and Melchizedeks

Enki

Inanna

Jesus

Sophia

Divine Father

Divine Mother

Divine Creatress, hear my prayer

Divine Seed, rise in me

Source of all Light and Life

Remember me

Restore the sisterhood

Restore the knighthood

Restore your creation

Send us your compassion

And heal the monsters we have become

That your eternal glory may shine in us forevermore

 

+J. Zdenek, Equinox Supplication, 2018

Shower Yoga? ((Don't Try This at Home))

 Camel Pose/Heart Chakra Clearing

Camel Pose/Heart Chakra Clearing

As a Taurus girl, I enjoy many simple pleasures. Like sleeping. Eating. Yoga. And showers. I also like to exert as little energy as necessary (since Taurus tends to explode into action when it is necessary) so if I can combine some of my favorite rejuvenating activities into one luxurious experience EVEN BETTER.  I'm sure I'm not the first to do yoga in the shower, nor the last, still I must warn you: this is a professional yoga instructor pictured. (Also a professional shower taker.) So please ask your doctor before doing any yoga in your shower. (No doctor would recommend this.) So it seems we must wait for someone to make a yoga safe shower. (Please someone do it!) In the meantime, I have taken the risks upon myself to develop a personal yoga shower practice that I can only assume is safe for myself. So until someone has developed a yoga safe shower for you and you are able to get your doctor's approval you are welcome to imagine how good it might feel to do yoga in the shower. If you choose to attempt this (which I do NOT recommend!) please assume all risks yourself. Also, in the spirit of being body positive, (and in the spirit of Taurus) this photo shoot was taken right after I ate a big dinner, so enjoy the full belly pix, cuz I did. ***I do recommend waiting 30 minutes after eating to practice yoga!*** <3 Namaste, Jess

 Modified Down Dog/Hands on Wall/Spine Lengthening

Modified Down Dog/Hands on Wall/Spine Lengthening

 Modified Down Dog/Hands on Tub/Spine Lengthening/Hamstring Stretch

Modified Down Dog/Hands on Tub/Spine Lengthening/Hamstring Stretch

 Forward Fold/Hamstrings/Low Back

Forward Fold/Hamstrings/Low Back

 Hands and Knees Pose/Hot water on the low back/Stress relief/Eases Soreness/Moves Kundalini&nbsp;

Hands and Knees Pose/Hot water on the low back/Stress relief/Eases Soreness/Moves Kundalini 

 Pyramid/Triangle/Hamstrings/Twist/Heart Opener

Pyramid/Triangle/Hamstrings/Twist/Heart Opener

 Take time to relax, rest, and ground into your deep center. These are crazy times. Remember who you are. All will be well. &lt;3&nbsp;

Take time to relax, rest, and ground into your deep center. These are crazy times. Remember who you are. All will be well. <3 

Goddess Rising

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I know I'm broken in some fundamental way.
I worry I can't be fixed. 
Broken open is how the light gets in.
Broken like the bread at communion.
Sometimes breaking is necessary and good.
It still hurts like hell.

I have these edges, these thorns around my heart.
I have this on again off again relationship with true love that plays out in my other relationships. For the last year of my marriage I told my ex that I wanted a divorce once a month. This was before I was tracking and making peace with my moon cycle. It seems there was a pattern. As I was still working to heal the effects of childhood trauma and postpartum depression--in winter, as a stay at home mom. As I was searching for that Divine Masculine energy to hold me safe to open more.  But I've never felt safe to open all the way. And so I shut down and push away.  It's not personal. I'm just broken in some fundamental way.

And there are simply underworld days.
For I am a woman.
I know birth, sex, and death mysteries.
I am encoded with the DNA of snake priestesses, Isis, and Magdalene
Who were demonized and feared in my childhood Christianity.

And I have this ancient self-hatred in need of redemption
Which has infected the human body
And polluted the waters of Earth.

"I am the whore and the holy woman." -Sophia

A mother is supposed to be all loving
Still she loses her shit sometimes,
Still she knows how to love her children
And her lovers
All night long.
We are human mothers, remembering how to be divine mothers in a world where the divine feminine was repressed, bought, sold, raped and cut up into pieces.

I love all mankind, for they are my children.
I am the mother of monsters
And still I love all of my children.
Some of us have been wounded.
I am a wounded healer. 
Finding that edge between unconditional sacrificial love
And Stockholm syndrome.

Repudiating a woman was once sport. There were man codes passed around by those who ruled the public square on how to silence women and keep them away from places of power.  Spiritual power once belonged to the Goddess dear Catholic church. In those days, wisdom flowed from the center of cities like milk from a mother's breast.  That was before She fell.

I feel those ancient trauma codes still activated in our DNA
How he knows how to tear her down in every way. 
And how she knows how to awaken in him the King.
And how these were torn asunder.
And how she learned to break his heart
Which he thought he could live without.

I have two big fears: fame and death. Fear of fame leads to this weird self sabotaging I do to not be too successful. Not to shine too much. Not to attract too much attention. Just enough to pay the bills and live in my mom cave. Goddess pushes me to go back to the public square. Walk into redemption.

I feel that flighty wide-eyed deer in me
And I feel marked and jittery in public some days.
I want to live in the caves again some days.
I want to find the sacred guardians who protected the fragile feminine some days. 
I hear Goddess saying: you've not learned your lessons yet if you still believe that you are fragile. 

I don't want to return to the center of the city. I was once reputed there. Hung there. Burned there. I remember. For I am connected to Her body. To women everywhere throughout time. To Sophia, the Divine Mother. Still she says, Come on, this is where we are going.

I'm building bridges
Like Hermes and Dionysus as they flirt
With the opposites
Until humanity discovers again
Sacred Union

Initiations into the power of Spirit are to come.
The tide is turning.
She will speak now. She will return to the center of the city.
Wisdom is rising up from the Earth. 

He loves a wounded feminine, a sexless Mary, because she makes him feel strong, and he is so very insecure. (He doesn't want you to find this out, so prepare to hold onto his shadow and a wild ride.) But this isn't really love. It's safe. He needs you to awaken his soul. It is not as weak as he fears. You must teach him. Just as the Good Shepherd seeks the lost sheep. You are seeking the lost boys, oh Mother Divine.

He knows the codes to publicly humiliate her, to keep her small. She knows the codes to crown him True King of Earth. 

He also fears what he must master: standing his unique sacred ground in the presence of the traumatized/toxic feminine, the overwhelming mother, and the powerful sex goddess.

He must learn, as Zeus did, how to respect the energy of Hecate the wise witch, and the power of her magic, and her heart that defies his logic. He must learn to dance in his power with her in her power.

Sacred masculine. Sacred feminine.

Apollo must learn that dragons are not for slaying.
For the Dragons protect holy places and breathe holy fire.
So when I make my boundaries,
Please respect them.
For I am not a country
To be invaded.
But still he pressed: how can I love what I cannot control?

Then I realize I am simply shedding this ancient hatred of the feminine.
I am shedding the male gaze.
I am shedding the fears the gods had of the goddess that I had mistaken for my own.

I find my way back to the naive little girl who was always worthy of love. Who was not always Medusa, that happened after her rape. Not always an evil manipulating witch as he feared, but a woman who had learned wisdom in the dark places he had never been. 

Still the cosmic rape was allowed. Ordained.
And men looked away. And denied that it was really that bad.
And She fell. 
And in her terror she tore holes in the hologram,
And birthed monsters,
And assisted the darkness in fragmenting the divine.

I regret
I worry
I have panic attacks
I feel trauma invade and rape the present moment with the darkness of the ancient past.
I can Ice Princess for a while.
I love so big, you can't possibly.
Stay away. You'll only hurt me. I'll only hurt you.

For I'm still just a human woman, not fully goddess, so please don't be confused.
I am only made in Her image.
The fantasy may help you with your survival, but I'm not just some fantasy.
And escapism is just another prison of your soul.

I will over-promise and under deliver, every time
As mostly a projection
Mostly muse
Mostly gooey center
Fertile void
Terror Herself.

All the places we dread to go, find us eventually.

So I check them off the list. I can't think of much more to fear now. Just death. Just the transition.

Then what?

Then the lioness.
It's scary to be strong.

It cuts both ways
It's scary to be weak.
And now you must learn to dance dear ones.

My heart is a distant country, to which you've never been.
But our countries are at war.
Though we don't remember why.

I am writing peace treaties.
Still
I have a gift for catalyzing rage.
I didn't understand this until I realized
Aphrodite is married to Ares.

Until I remembered how love flows into the lowest places
Because it's like a river.

These are times of the paradox. The switching of opposites. The embracing of shadow. The reconnection to pain so it can be healed and released in humanity. 

What we do not bring to conscious appears in our life as fate -Jung

Fragile and yet
Lioness
Stubborn
Snake Haired
A Raging Fire with Bull Headed Determination

I'm learning that my fears are liars.
They are not the cages I believed.
Not the graves dug for me.
Rise, she whispers

Receive Persephone's blessing
As she makes her way home
To the center
To Spring
And her Divine Mother
Where you too shall bloom

"Best Practices of Intuitive Work: Rules of Engagement" Monday Meditations

  Identifying red flags, creating healthy boundaries, and tips for working with Light Workers.&nbsp;

Identifying red flags, creating healthy boundaries, and tips for working with Light Workers. 

As I began my journey of awakening to the gifts and sensitivities I had, I crossed many taboo thresholds and meandered into murky territory that frightened people close to me and bucked orthodox Christianity. I knew there was something more to our feelings and our imaginations than was being accepted in Sunday School or our science based prove-it-to-me mentality. Still there were good reasons to be wary of mediums. You don't want to mess with a powerful woman who possesses magical abilities.  Trust me on this. 

When I was ready to open deeper I found a mentor who taught me how to engage in this work with integrity and I wanted to pass along some of this wisdom for those navigating this mysterious terrain.  Here are some rules of engagement that I use in my practice with clients:

1. Respect the sovereignty of every being

I learned about this concept when I was studying the Montessori Method for teaching to children.  Humans are not blank slates. Each human has access to an inner teacher (the Holy Spirit/the Self/Higher Self) who guides the soul on their journey of discovery.  Each soul has a unique path, so one size will not fit all. When we respect the inner world of children and of our clients, we are making room for their inner teacher to emerge.  We are also stepping out of a power imbalance that happens with guru/devotee.

It's easy to get caught up in idolizing a guru, teacher, or higher being, but no matter what kinds of gifts someone has, each of us is called to awaken and to look within. Just as we can't continue to export our jobs, so we can't continue to export our religion or spirituality. The inner world of the human being is sacred space and we can't have access to someone's most private reality, nor should we. The soul has a right to a safe container for learning and growing and protecting fragile parts of self until they are ready to emerge in the world.  No matter how wise or powerful another being, as humans we have every right to our sovereignty, freedom and choice. 

I will not ever say to a client that I know something about them that they don't know about themselves.  Instead I will offer my intuitive hits and ask my clients to consider if it resonates for them or not. As sovereign beings we all have free will and personal choice to decide what to believe for ourselves.  I will encourage my clients to check with their guides/intuition if things feel right for them. We can always leave information outside of our space, in a bubble for future consideration.  My goal is to catalyze and awaken your inner teacher so that you can eventually do this work without me.  

2. Opening up only for your highest good and the highest good of all beings

Channeling was a no-no in my Christian circles growing up. Even meditation was frowned upon for if you simply opened your mind, Satan could surely sneak right in! I heard some Christians justify this rational to stay busy all the time and never practice relaxing and opening their mind to peace and the mere presence of mystery, the Holy Spirit or Being itself.  Being open is a yin practice, a feminine state of being that rests and heals and receives guidance from Source. It's the listening aspect of prayer rather than the asking.  As sovereign beings we can declare for ourselves what kinds of energy we are willing to open ourselves up to and what kinds we are not. We can make an intention when we relax or meditate that we are only opening up to receive that which is for our highest good and the highest good of all beings and that will cover us and connect us to our most potent sources of wisdom.  

Everyone's practice of mediation is different.  Some people move into the void, into no-thing, into silence.  Others move into visuals, see beings, travel places, or hear voices or music. Some get inspiration for a work project or creative project or receive downloads of information on questions they ask. 

Just by relaxing and calming the body, we are gaining access to the upstairs brain which opens us up to higher states of being. When we are moving too fast, scared, or triggered, or in survival mode, or have adrenal fatigue we are operating from the downstairs reptilian brain and the fight/flight/fear/freeze responses. This is not the ideal place to live life from--sure it's great when you need to run from a bear, but not everyday should feel like an emergency situation.  However the pace of life in America does a good job to keep us running around as if we are always traumatized. The upstairs brain requires calm and peace. There we can easily find solutions to problems that when frazzled are just simply out of reach. 

3. Honor the human/honor the shadow
Nobody here is perfect. Even the most glittery guru has their issues. Carl Jung said there was much danger in identifying one's ego with beings of light: it creates a really big shadow. Life must be balanced. I've met a few healers who believe that they are a powerful being from history and this is always a red flag for me, for I see that they are here born as a human with a different name in a different time and I wonder about that human and I care for the traumatized ones who reached so deeply for the light when the darkness seemed all consuming.  We all may have access to these higher streams of consciousness (via the Akashic Records), but we are still humans walking this earth.  We are still both animal and divine. We are saved by grace, and still sinners. What is denied in our consciousness grows stronger in the shadows until one day it erupts to restore balance to the game.  All of us light workers would do well to keep our shadows in our sights.  For when I can't see my shadow, I'm most likely to project in on someone else and cause a lot of pain.  If a healer identifies with only the light and believes themselves to be a god--you can bet there is a devil very close by.  And watch out: it might be you! Groups like this tend to demonize and fragment others, as happened throughout history in witch burnings and anathematizing; the opposite must be killed (scape-goated) with the community's shadow.  A long time ago the shadow was the dance parter, the tension is meant to be held, not burned at the stake.

If someone can't admit that they are wrong, watch out. Look for mentors who are up front about their growth edge and personal struggles. People in love with power will not love others very well, and if you're looking for healing, you'll want to find people who can truly love you on this leg of your journey. Remember: Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails. (1 Corinthians 13: 4)  

4. Remember to Play
Ultimately we're very small in the grand scheme of life. Pride can be a good thing when it's rooted in our divine essence and celebrating the goodness of life. But when people want to control the conversation, control how everything pans out, control one view of reality, watch out.  When we've lost the ability to play and be spontaneous in the present moment, then we're running on trauma, not pneuma (spirit).  We come to the table as different but created equal.  May we co-create a joyful reality for the highest good of all beings.

5. Stop and smell the flowers
There are many gifted people in the world we can learn from. Don't put all your eggs in one basket and don't make one teacher your sole source of wisdom. Visit other flowers. There's so much beauty to experience!

I hope these rules of engagement help clear up confusion and boost your confidence to expand your consciousness in a safe and respectful way!

The light in me salutes the light in you.  Have a beautiful week.
Namaste,
Jessica
 

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I'm so excited to share a new service with my clients! I am now offering a 6 month healing program of YogaReiki Therapy. 

If you're ready to change your life in amazing ways, try this proven formula: 1 hour yoga sessions, 3x a week, for 6 months. This alone would transform your health in profound ways. Along with my education, specialization, and experience I offer these additional ingredients: 
+Personalized yoga instruction for your unique body type
+Clients receive Reiki (light healing) each session
+Be pampered with essential oils
+Meditation instruction
+A confidential compassionate listening ear
+Spiritual Guidance

Is this you?
+You want to begin yoga, but you're nervous about starting in a yoga studio
+You want to feel more alive, revitalized, focused and passionate about your life
+You want to feel good in your body again, no matter how old you are, or what you've been through
+You're interested in practicing meditation to support your overall wellbeing
+You're ready to move past deep blocks physically, emotionally and spiritually
+You suffer from some longer term emotional, physical or spiritual pain that requires a specialist to tailor a yoga practice to suit your individual needs and move at your own pace
+You're ready to see how you can prove your fears wrong and thrive with the support of a mentor, a friend, a cheerleader, and a wellness coach

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Here is what some of my students are saying:

"I have been doing yoga with Jessica since May. At the time I started, I had no idea the impact this amazing, compassionate woman would have on my life. She has helped me move past trauma that had held me in a really critical place for most of my life, and has showed me how to extend grace, love and compassion to myself. I have recently committed to a six month program of yoga 3 times a week. And this has been my peace when life has gotten overwhelming. This is the way that this mama of 4 chooses to self care. After 6 weeks on this regimen I have noticed a huge improvement in my mood, a huge improvement in my flexibility, I'm down 10 pounds and can tell that my body is becoming more toned. And can I just say that I am doing poses I never thought I'd accomplish!?! I am so excited to see the growth that the coming weeks and months will bring." -Andrea

"I want you to know that with your yoga and meditation guidance you've helped me more than any amount of clinical therapy ever has helped me, and that's including medication too. Jessica, you are incredibly gifted and strong and one of the best souls I've ever met. You're an amazing teacher." -Lonna 

Spaces are limited so sign up to start your healing YogaReiki therapy today!  Reserve your spot by purchasing your first month today

"Clearing & Grounding 11 min Meditation" Monday Meditations

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Yes we need more than just thoughts and prayers, but remember all that is manifest on the earth plane began in the subtle. Thoughts & prayers grow into action. Right action only springs from right concentration. Concentration takes practice. Regular meditation practice can bring you back home to the truth of your being where the problems that overwhelm us become much more manageable. So may we not dismiss the power rooted in the open mind and present body that we may learn how to move undivided within and without, with more strength, with more grace ease and joy, with more together, towards our highest good and the highest good of all beings. 

May all beings be happy and free.  

Love,

Jessica

"Detoxing God" Monday Meditations

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Yesterday Lutherans all over the world celebrated 500 years since Martin Luther nailed his 95 thesis to the door of the Catholic Church. His voice rocked the church and began a cascade of reform in the church. As a descendant of Lutherans and Lutheran ministers, and as a woman reclaiming my voice and spiritual power that comes from within, as a priestess and ambassador of the Divine Feminine, I stand with the ancient sisterhood of priestesses and in the spiritual lineage of sacred women including Magdalene, Mary, Medusa, Aphrodite, Isis, Inanna, Sophia, and all the women who have been silenced, hung, burned and persecuted under an age of patriarchy--we are here today in spirit and flesh nailing a new reform to the church doors. Is the church now ready for a reformation birthed by the Divine Feminine? We are awaiting our crown's restoration that our collective madness may be healed, that sacred imagination may once again help us co-create God's full-inclusive kingdom on earth.  

As a sister, mother, daughter and friend, I offer my memoir as a voice for continued reform in the church half a millennia later.  I hope you enjoy this reading of the introduction of my book.  I will continue to post readings until I have narrated the entire book, so stay tuned!

Detoxing God is available on Amazon, and also on CreateSpace where I receive more per book if you please.  Thank you for supporting this conversation and work on healing sexual and spiritual abuse.

Blessing on these upcoming sacred days. All Holy Eve. All Saints. All Souls.  As the ancestors draw near, may we make amends, may we press on and continue to walk in the way of love until the good work is accomplished.  May all beings be happy and free. 

Namaste,
Jessica 

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"Everything Returns to its Root" Monday Meditations

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Earlier in the week this little melody and lyrics came to me:

Mary Magdalene tell us again what the Savior said.
Everything returns, she said, to to the root.
All that is divine, she said, will return home.
Do not fear, I am always with you,
Do not fear, I am always with you,
Till the end of the age.

I had been preparing a teaching on mantras when I realized Mary Magdalene's message (which appears in her Gospel) echoes spiritual teachings found in yoga philosophy.  Some believe Mary Magdalene went on to become a yogini who lived in a cave developing her magical powers and communing with the angels (with long hair covering her body) when she escaped to France.

In many spiritual traditions there is a notion that humanity fell from a state of grace. In yoga circles I have heard this fall referred to as the Kali Yuga, a time when evil runs the show and the good are not rewarded. I often wonder, how much farther will we fall before we return to grace?  May it not be much farther.

I have read that the sages understood that creation would be fragmented and then one day, regathered and made new. For now, the wheat grows with the chaff. Great spiritual teachers worked to give humanity some tools for getting through this time. As the breaking continues, may we trust that what once was scattered shall be gathered back into one. 

The practice of mantra was the science of discovering the smallest sacred sounds that could not be broken down any farther. By practicing mantras we connect back to the grid of our former wholeness. I sing to put myself back together. I think we've all felt a song bring us back home to our soul. May we each hear the sound the universe makes expressing itself as us. 

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The Bible says, "Fear not" 365 times, that's a reminder for every day of the year. While the news media and society continues to pressure us to worry and fear, we can resist by returning to that which is unbreakable, that which will survive all that has been broken, we can return to the root of our divine nature and remember who we are and where we come from, and know we shall return to the love that brought us here to be an expression of that love on earth at a time when it is most needed.

May we each find that unbreakable root within. May the pillars of the earth rise again. May peace prevail. May love find a way.

 The light in me salutes the light in you, namaste, namaste. &lt;3 Jessica

The light in me salutes the light in you, namaste, namaste.
<3 Jessica

Join me October 28 from 9-11 am for a workshop on Shadow Self-Integration. We will be exploring Carl Jung's ideas of the shadow and how to build bridges with unconscious aspects of ourselves through dreams, active imagination, and myths.  Space is limited. Register here.

"Healing Trauma with Yoga & Fairytales" Monday Meditations

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Waking up this morning to hear the news of yet another shooting, I felt all those old padlocks shutting down my heart center. It hurts to feel so much pain, and there seems to be so much in our world today, almost too much to bear somedays. Many of us turn to anger before sadness. Or we just cut off a connection to our feelings all together. Those feelings don't just shut off though. They get lodged in our bodies, in our energy and if left unresolved can cause all kinds of sickness. 

I have been working on trauma recovery for many years. It is a constant practice. One that brought me to yoga. When I first began practicing I would literally cry as I stretched out my hips.  Not because of the physical pain, but because of all the emotional pain that had been lodged there over the years.  It takes time and intention and mindful breathing and moving for us to recognize and release trauma from our bodies. 

When old trauma resurfaces I feel cut off from the center of my being. I start to panic trying to get back in. But trauma has its own architecture, laws, codes and keys. I used to spend years locked out of myself. In some ways recovering myself is still an on-going practice. There is always so much more for us to discover about who we really are and how resilient we can be.

Now I have learned many practices to help me get back to my center more quickly. When I'm in trauma mode, I can't access all parts of me. I am stuck in an identification with a wounded part of myself--usually a younger version of myself. When things got bad, I used to erupt in a lot of anger and self hatred at this younger version of myself who couldn't figure out how to get back home to the center of her being.  I'm grateful to have learned many ways to unlock this old trauma pattern and if this can help even just one other person, I would be so happy to share what I've learned.

I once saw Donald Kalsched give a talk in Chicago on his book, The Inner World of Trauma, Archetypal Defenses of the Human Spirit.  I was so inspired by this man's work. He seemed to understand my innerworld in a way that no one else did. I read his book many times and I continue to return to it in my own healing journey. At the talk he said that the cutting edge of this field of work was to take these teachings and integrate them with other embodied healing arts such as body movement and yoga. My heart felt ablaze and I knew this was to be my path.  

On October 13-14 I'm excited to offer my first workshop on this material in Pipestone, MN at a sacred place dedicated to peace.  I will be sharing some of Kalsched's ideas on how we may use fairytales to understand our innerworld better.  I'll also be offering yoga and meditation practices that are essential and beneficial for healing trauma.  If you are a counselor or recovering from PTSD and looking for some more tools in your tool box, this retreat will offer you new ideas, healing practices, and sacred space to rest and connect with your center and help others when they are triggered to get back to theirs. 

May we all find courage and resilience in the face of whatever traumas affect our lives. May we press deeper into love for ourselves and others that all beings may be happy and free. 

May beauty and joy grace your week,
Jessica

Click here to save your spot. Registration closes this Friday. 

 Enjoy Pipestone National Monument and feel the energy of this sacred Native American site dedicated to peace.

Enjoy Pipestone National Monument and feel the energy of this sacred Native American site dedicated to peace.

"Persephone's Descent" Monday Meditations

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FALLING TO EARTH AND BELOW

A gift from Aphrodite today, a peace offering, an invitation to all that is dead in us, or soon shall be.

The Goddess of Love wants it known that she has a fierce side. She demands careful attention to every detail. You must learn the lessons of love well, she insists. You cannot simply say it or fantasize about it. You must incarnate it. You must learn the consequences of your actions. See how your energy is mirrored back to you. You are responsible for what you are creating. You cannot force someone else to create or change for you.  All you can do is look within and learn how to love better. Come to me all who are weary. I will challenge you with impossible tasks. You will find you cannot possibly complete them. You will feel you will never be able learn these lessons. And then--right there--when you are nailed, then you will see. You will find the help you need to succeed when you finally surrender to love. 

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Aphrodite is not all candle light and rose petals.  She is green-eyed in the presence of Persephone's ever youthful beauty.  She tortures young Psyche who wishes to marry an immortal, Eros, Aphrodite's son. The Goddess of Love sends Psyche on impossible missions; she sends her to steal the Goddess of the Underworld's beauty elixir and return it to her. Aphrodite in her shadow state, encourages those mortals who long for eternal love to go and steal beauty from the underworld for it.

Aphrodite is married to Ares, not the chill bearded dude with the man bun, but the God of War, and things have been a little dicey lately.  What once was a dance, a tease, an energy exchange, fell flat from the high octane sacred order into three dimensional time, a place where Aphrodite's mysteries have been shamed out of religion, a place where her holy daughter Harmony and her inspiring frequencies are not as well known as her other sons: Phobos and Demos. 

The target of war has become ourselves, our children, our neighbors, and our planet.  The true Holy War is a tension in opposites held with compassion. When that tension is held in fierce love, it opens up a third; Wisdom's Womb is seeded and love is born again.

For humans, learning has become traumatic. The hate machine hopes you will hate back and repeat the cycles trauma. But if enough of us learn to how to truly love, to receive love, to have love for all parts of ourselves and all parts of creation, to love even our enemies and pray for those who hurt us, what then?

Many miracles my friends. 

I had forgotten how my mood is so connected to the light. And since we turned past the fall equinox, past the balance of dark and light, now there will be more darkness every day until the winter solstice. I realized today how I was resisting this descent. I forgot how Hades was pulling up in his black mustang to pick up Persephone and they were going to grab a coffee before making their annual descent to the Underworld. Still my body resists. I grasp for so many illusions and so many attachments.

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Woodpecker visits me today after I set the altar anew. I thought about those Altar Guild women and how sacred and ancient of a practice this is. I thought about how setting the altar was as close as women could get to the holy of holies which was guarded by men in skirts who deemed life-giving menstrual blood too unholy for a woman to touch the chalice that represents her own sacred life-giving power.  I thought about how it is only the female energy line in the fibonacci sequence that crosses The Void. I thought about the sacred geometry of the womb and I wondered how we ever believed we were not closer to the divine, how we ever forgot that we came here to initiate the masculine, to transform the martian mind to heart-centered man, as we invited them ever closer to the heart of our Beloved that always dwelled in our bodies in a very special way. Oh how some have resisted and twisted this love!

Woodpecker gives me a message: open to new possibilities. Make your home in your roots, Remember your deep long ago dream that you have almost forgotten. Where did your bliss go? Listen to the rhythm of your soul. Walk to the beat of your own drum. Open, open, open. Let go, let go, it's ok to let go.

I am learning. Dying is just like giving birth.  Soon we will be crossing The Sacred Void.  Sisters, Mothers, Grandmothers take hands. Link hearts and crowns. Thy will be done, on Earth as in Heaven. 

Birch Tree says: humanity, oh humanity, remember those moments of sheer joy before the opposite terror presented itself. The joy is just as real as the nightmare. Why do you spin so many horrors? Open, open, open your imaginations to infinite divine possibility.

It is true that Wisdom fell from heaven and became mad on earth. She was kicked out of the cities of men. She was sold and prostituted among the powerful. Her divinity was thrown out with the beggar's trash. Her golden tendrils that once softened men's hearts became like rattling snakes. Her sweet chest that once made men worship God in the bedroom, became locked away behind her slumped and grieving shoulders. Her frame has been bent so low as if she is moving to spiral to safety, creating a hard shell as she knew how to do so long ago, as she learned with Aphrodite in the sea making pearls. 

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But you have been called to rise not to go back. You are called to noble, sacred, passionate love. Remember that you do not truly hate this tender part of yourselves that wants to hide behind the toughest shell. Your innocence is not lost. Your salvation yet awaits. The doorways of pain are the labors of love. Come. Come closer to that which you deny within. Come and listen to the leaves and what they have to say about the messages on the wind.

I pull cards for the altar. Tarot says: Stop clinging to external security. Rise up and see how there is an abundance that flows to you and through you, enough to share with all parts of self, with all in need.

Peace be with you.

Let us pray.

May the sisters who once fragmented and fought and competed and divided return to the sacred circle of love and reconciliation that we create when we join one another in harmony with the Divine Cosmos. 

We ask the Source of all Creation, and sacred sowers of light and love to knit us together in one accord, all those who join us in this holy imaginal space, now or in any future or past time, create among us a sacred circle that we may remember how we are one as we were in the beginning and shall be evermore. Dear Ancestors, Saints and Holy Mothers, Gaia, assist us in our connection to the Beloved. Help us harmonize with the Sacred Earth, her wisdom, to her loving presence.  Ancient helpers and wise teachers of the law of love and unity, lead us to the heart of the Sacred Cosmos again, come and walk among us as in days of old.  Heal our bodies. Direct our minds. Open our hearts. Inspire us dear Muses! I ask for this or better, for the greatest good of all.

Goddess, some call you, Shekinah, Sophia, Isis, Mary, Holy Creatrix of the Void, the Consort of God, Demon Slayer, The Essence of Time, Holy Mother of Jesus, Keeper of the Keys to Resurrection and Life. How can we, who are reflections of you, be of assistance in transforming our world? What shall we create together for the highest good of ourselves and all beings everywhere?

Listen deeply to Divine Wisdom flowing to you now. What does the divine union of Source and Wisdom wish to birth through you? What do you see, feel, and hear? 

* * *  *  * * *

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Blessed be. We ask for this or better for the greatest good of all. So let it be, as above, so below, as within, so without. May all beings everywhere be happy and free! May Christ-Consciousness, Divine Love, Infinite Source, Heart-Centered Guardians, Ascended Masters, Guardians of Earth, Guardians of the Heavens, Saints who have gone before us, all those working for humanity's highest good and the highest good of all creation, help us. We ask you to assist us in casting off our sin, assist us in our mending, assist us in our awakening, assist us in our resurrection, assist us in our ascension. Blessed be.

"And may the human psyche learn how she becomes immortal.  May humanity learn to die before they die," the Magdalene chimes in.  

Persephone knows: What falls will rise again. The end is merely a new beginning.

Have a beautiful adventurous week participating in the rebirth of love on earth <3

 Join Grant and I in Pipestone Oct 13-14.&nbsp; We're planning to stay at an historic (haunted!) hotel on Friday the 13. I will be offering teachings on healing trauma through yoga and fairytales and participants will be able to visit this powerful sacred land dedicated to peace on earth. Learn more &amp;&nbsp; Register here.

Join Grant and I in Pipestone Oct 13-14.  We're planning to stay at an historic (haunted!) hotel on Friday the 13. I will be offering teachings on healing trauma through yoga and fairytales and participants will be able to visit this powerful sacred land dedicated to peace on earth. Learn more & Register here.

The light in me salutes the light in you,
Namaste, namaste,
Jess

 Jessica Zdenek is the High Priestess of Taraloma Earth Temple, a Yogini in Residence at Blue Lotus Studio, in Moorhead, MN.&nbsp;She offers group and private yoga lessons, prenatal yoga, healing sessions, on-line yoga videos &amp; classes, Reike, sound healing,&nbsp;guided relaxations, meditation instruction, dream interpretations, tarot readings, energy clearings, intuitive readings,&nbsp;workshops, music events, and other things that strike her fancy.&nbsp;She is also available to speak and preach. Jessica has a Masters of Arts in Theology from Fuller Seminary, a Bachelors in Psychology from St. Olaf College, she is a certified yoga instructor,&nbsp;Dove Oracle Priestess, and Nikki-The-Know-It-All-From-North-Dakota, dontcha know.

Jessica Zdenek is the High Priestess of Taraloma Earth Temple, a Yogini in Residence at Blue Lotus Studio, in Moorhead, MN. She offers group and private yoga lessons, prenatal yoga, healing sessions, on-line yoga videos & classes, Reike, sound healing, guided relaxations, meditation instruction, dream interpretations, tarot readings, energy clearings, intuitive readings, workshops, music events, and other things that strike her fancy. She is also available to speak and preach. Jessica has a Masters of Arts in Theology from Fuller Seminary, a Bachelors in Psychology from St. Olaf College, she is a certified yoga instructor, Dove Oracle Priestess, and Nikki-The-Know-It-All-From-North-Dakota, dontcha know.

Sutra of Ayra-Tara

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Sutra of Ayra-Tara vs. 1, 2, 4, 5 & 8

Homage to the Three Jewels
Homage to Venerable Tara!

Having reached this gem-like paradise, 
Understand actions and their results:
Keep to good and leave evil aside!
For whoever practices wrong actions
Will, in the life that is to come, fall down.

Beasts are dumb and stupid; one eats another;
Up weary paths, down cliffs, they climb and fall,
In panic, terror-stricken, trembling with fear,
Full of caution--one cannot conceive their sufferings.

Sentient beings who are born in hells
Are led against their wills by vicious Yamas,
Burned and cooked and cut up with sharp weapons; 
Their suffering, hot or cold, cannot be borne.

Therefore, doing wrong deeds in this life
Manifests to oneself, magnified--
For many eons, fierce sorrow torments one
With no time to escape, nor chance to bear it.

But though happy themselves aid all migrators,
Greed, hate, delusion gone, root of compassion
Firm, and striving with three doors pure do virtue,
Strive in this essence of the most profound.

Yoga Basics Workshop this Saturday September 23, 8-11 a.m.

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  • Introduction to Yoga as a way of life
  • Instruction on basic yoga postures and how to modify for your body
  • Experience a gentle yoga practice
  • Great for beginners or those who want to solidify their yoga foundation
  • Instructor has over 16 years as a practitioner of yoga, and four years of teaching
    Space is limited!!
    Register for this and other upcoming workshops here.

Fall Yoga Retreat: Healing Trauma through Yoga & Fairytales in Pipestone, MN on Sacred Land

 Visit the historic town of Pipestone, MN and experience the sacred peaceful grounds of Pipestone National Monument. On this land dedicated to peace and integration of all people we will explore healing trauma through yoga based on the books, Overcoming Trauma through Yoga-Reclaiming Your Body by David Emerson and Elizabeth Hopper, Phd, the IRest Program for Healing PTSD by Richard C. Miller, and Donald Kalsched's book, The Inner World Of Trauma, Archetypal Defenses of the Personal Spirit. &nbsp;To get the most out of this experience, I would recommend purchasing the books!&nbsp;  Our experience will begin at 4 p.m. Friday October 13 and run through dinner Saturday. &nbsp;Our days will include learning about the nature of trauma through fairytales, mapping our own personal and ancestral wounds and prospectively our personal and collective dharma, practicing gentle Healing Yoga and Restorative Yoga, visiting the Sacred Native American land at Pipestone National Monument. &nbsp;You are invited to stay overnight in a historic (rumored haunted) hotel on Friday the 13th! You will also experience healing music, a peace making ceremony, meditations, natural beauty, intriguing mystery, and a deeper level of understanding your inner world and self-care practices. &nbsp;Please make a downpayment to reserve your place. More information to come soon!

Visit the historic town of Pipestone, MN and experience the sacred peaceful grounds of Pipestone National Monument. On this land dedicated to peace and integration of all people we will explore healing trauma through yoga based on the books, Overcoming Trauma through Yoga-Reclaiming Your Body by David Emerson and Elizabeth Hopper, Phd, the IRest Program for Healing PTSD by Richard C. Miller, and Donald Kalsched's book, The Inner World Of Trauma, Archetypal Defenses of the Personal Spirit.  To get the most out of this experience, I would recommend purchasing the books! 

Our experience will begin at 4 p.m. Friday October 13 and run through dinner Saturday.  Our days will include learning about the nature of trauma through fairytales, mapping our own personal and ancestral wounds and prospectively our personal and collective dharma, practicing gentle Healing Yoga and Restorative Yoga, visiting the Sacred Native American land at Pipestone National Monument.  You are invited to stay overnight in a historic (rumored haunted) hotel on Friday the 13th! You will also experience healing music, a peace making ceremony, meditations, natural beauty, intriguing mystery, and a deeper level of understanding your inner world and self-care practices.  Please make a downpayment to reserve your place. More information to come soon!

May all beings everywhere be now happy and free!
The light in me salutes the light in you, namaste, namaste <3
Jessica

"I am a part of all that is" Monday Meditations

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When the world feels overwhelming, I pray. When I feel small compared to the size of the problems that surround me, I pray.  For me, singing is my deepest prayer. Last week I came across this old Norwegian folk song and I have been singing it ever since. May these words bring comfort, strengthen, and help us to remember that the true point of power is here and now. Together, in the unity of the divine force of life which flows through all of creation, we can do immeasurable good. May it be so <3

Lyrics:
I am a part
Of all that is
And all that is
Is a part of me
And I belong here
In this world
I belong here
As who I am

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Classes start this week at Blue Lotus Studio in Moorhead, MN! Sign up for Workshops and our Fall Retreat: www.taraloma.com.

 Classes start this week at Blue Lotus Studio in Moorhead, MN! Sign up for Workshops and our Fall Retreat:  www.taraloma.com .

Classes start this week at Blue Lotus Studio in Moorhead, MN! Sign up for Workshops and our Fall Retreat: www.taraloma.com.

The light in me salutes the light in you, namaste, namaste.
Have a beautiful week <3
Jess